Remote Team Meeting

                The Globetrotters team used the program Asana to remotely coordinate our work together. It was quite an experience. Asana is a program that is designed for group projects like ours, and we used the free trial to create accounts for everyone on our team. Once inside the program, we could chat, assign and accept tasks, create deadlines, and see how everyone’s progress was doing.

                One of the things that was nice about Asana was how frequently it reminded me about the project. I was getting email blasts daily, reminding me that I was expected to complete part of my project within the next day. After so many reminders though, it was more stressful and annoying than helpful.

                Overall, I learned a lot about collaboration without face-to-face encounters from this meeting. I learned that it is really important to be clear in those types of communications, because emails to send clarification questions and answers sure add up quickly. If I was able to express my point simply in one email, then everyone would be spared constant messages back and forth. I also learned the importance of being timely—at one point our team got a little behind our project deadlines and it made things pretty stressful. At one point, I was assigned to do data analysis on data that wasn’t collected yet, and I was stressing out because I felt pressure to perform on time, yet there was no way to get my piece done without the prior work. All in all, I feel that working remotely, although more convenient, isn’t as effective as meeting face to face.

Shout-out

This is a great post about how to find satisfaction in small and simple improvements. I found it really inspiring. Check it out here:

https://ajnevarez.wordpress.com/2014/11/29/life-on-the-margin/

Living Deliberately

                Today I had an intramural basketball game. I’ll try to keep a long story short, but we won, largely due to the effort of one of my teammates in playing terrific defense and shutting down our opponent’s best player. After the game, I was thinking about this friend of mine, and the lifestyle that he embodies. You see, he’s not especially tall, not especially strong, and doesn’t have the build of someone who looks like they should be an incredible athlete. To be blunt, he drew the short straw in the genetic lottery for athletic genes.

                But the thing about this friend of mine is how well he has managed his best resource: his willpower. At some point in his life, he decided that he wanted to be good at sports, and so he put in the time and effort to get into good shape. And on the court, he knows he’s not the most talented, nor the most athletic, yet he makes himself absolutely invaluable because he will work harder than anyone else on the court. He leverages his athleticism to the maximum and runs circles around everyone else, winning crucial hustle-plays, and as proved tonight, making him a crucial cog on a winning team. He’s a terror to play against and the best ally one could ever ask for in the sporting arena.

               

                I want to be him. I love the way in which this friend has decided what he wanted, and done it. His formula is that simple; decide and then do, but yet the way in which he executes his plans is masterful. It gives me hope to watch him flying around the basketball court. For me, he embodies my hope that the mind really can win over the protests of a lazy body, that deliberate change is possible, and that I can achieve my goals.

                After reflecting on the show that Ethan put on tonight, I’ve been changed. There is a higher level of living. It is possible to pivot course in a second, deliberately decide to move in a different life direction and be forever changed. How can you and I settle for anything less than greatness, when we know that such greatness is inside of us? I’m going out to live deliberately, starting now. That’s where true joy and true inner satisfaction is.  

Moderation

This week I’ve learned the value of moderation. Before school started, I was practically dying of boredom. At that time, I wanted nothing more than to have homework to do, because at least it was something to break the monotony of long summer days. Then school started, and all of the sudden my wish seemed rash. Suddenly life was all about trying to minimize the amount of homework I was doing, and trying to keep from over scheduling so that I had that elusive idea we call “free time”. Well, this past week school was out, and I traveled with my family down to St. George to enjoy the sunshine and a homework-free environment. And suddenly the boredom was back.

                This experience of constantly waffling back and forth between two opinions has got me thinking. It would be so easy to pin my happiness on the accomplishment of one or the other objectives. I could easily say “once school ends, then I’ll be happy because I’ll have time to do what I want to do.” I could also say the opposite once the summertime blues sinks in. I believe the key to happiness is not constantly dreaming about the future,  but rather enjoying the moment by handling all things in moderation. Vacation activities are awesome, but only if they are deserved because of hard work. I have a mission friend who once said: "Doing nothing is the hardest work of all, because one can never stop to rest. Without work, rest and relaxation have no meaning.” I love his train of thought. Only through moderation can we truly enjoy life to it’s fullest. I’m determined to continue to work hard when it’s time to work, and to play hard when it comes time to play. 

ToDoist

I thought that there were many outstanding presentations during our class conference the last two weeks. Most of them focused on how to help me as I entered the business environment in the future, but one that I found could be super applicable right now was the presentation about ToDoist. O One thing that I have been working on recently is trying to budget my time more effectively. I schedule myself around my assigned homework and work schedule, and at the current moment, I simply use the “Notes” feature of my computer to put all of my activities on a digital sticky note on my desktop. Its simplicity has been working for me so far, but I still feel like if I was a little more organized, I could achieve much more of my potential. Too often I catch myself wasting time with activities that don’t bring happiness or help me be more productive, when I could be either doing some happiness-building or productive activity. I think I’m going to try out ToDoist and see if it can help take my life organization to a higher plane. 

Elevator Pitches

As a general rule, I hate talking about myself. I’ve seen firsthand too many examples of people craving attention and the bragging, showing off, trash-talking, and talking oneself up that always accompanies it. I find it childish to see other people doing so, and I hate it when I find myself bragging. For whatever reason, I just never have really had a very strong desire for recognition. When I do well, I’m comfortable enough to know in my heart that I did well, and it doesn’t really matter to me who celebrates alongside me.  

In my self-centered worldview, I consider this aversion to bragging a positive thing, but when it comes down to interview time, this trait of mine really stabs me in the back. I feel awkward and uncomfortable when I am sitting in front of someone trying to play up all of my strengths. Because it’s so unnatural for me, I often end up saying a lot of dumb things in front of the very people I’m trying to impress.

As I was listening to the class presentation about elevator speeches, I was really intrigued. I've obviously heard references to elevator pitches before, but I was never really given an in-depth discussion about how useful they can be. What I heard in class has got me thinking about how useful such a pitch could be in helping me overcome my interviewing weakness. I’m determined to make sure that I plan ahead and prepare an elevator pitch so that when circumstances force me to turn the limelight on myself, I won’t be caught off guard and will be able to deliver key information about myself in a non-threatening, non-bragging way.

Perspective

There is something about injuries that seems to provoke reflection and thought. Perhaps it is the view of our own vulnerability, or perhaps it is the constant re-living of the moment and the “what if’s” that inevitably get asked. Regardless, a near-injury experience has been the lesson that highlighted my education this week.

The circumstances weren’t too surprising: I was playing a late night intramural flag football game, in some very cold weather. My team was losing really badly to a team of superior athletes. Pride injured, tempers were starting to get as sour as the weather. Against this backdrop, I was lined up on the defensive side of the ball, poised to rush the opposing quarterback. Despite the fact that the score was somewhere around 60-0, our opponents ran a trick play, in which they sent a player running sideways across the field before the play started, and then threw the ball to him to start the play, giving him the massive advantage of already being at full-speed before anyone else moved. Something about the play infuriated me: why were they still trying so hard when the game had already been decided at least 20 minutes ago? It wasn’t really a rational reason to be upset, but I was determined to show these guys that they couldn’t just run all over us at will. I was going to shut down the play.

So I took off after the quarterback. There was no blockers between him and me, just a footrace to determine a simple question: could I catch him before he threw the ball downfield? I tore across the field as fast as my feet would allow, but he wasn’t slow either, and we were close to the sideline when I was finally approaching him. His eyes were up-field, scanning to see where he should throw the ball, and I was behind him, completely out of sight. As I neared, I started to see him tense up, and bring his arm behind him, ready to throw. I was well too far behind him to simply grab the flags, but my rage propelled me onwards, hoping against hope that somehow I could salvage the play. In a last-ditch effort, I decided to dive straight for him. I threw myself forward, body completely parallel to the ground, hands outstretched and desperately reaching for the elusive flag hanging behind the quarterback

If you remember from the last general conference, Elder Christofferson made a passing reference to gravity, saying that “Resenting the law of gravity won’t keep a person from falling.” Well, I learned firsthand the truthfulness of that statement. Desperately wishing gravity would make an exception doesn’t change all that much either. My hands came about half a foot short of those flags, the ball released cleanly from the quarterback’s arm, and I found myself plummeting to the ground to land face-first. I skinned my knees, my hands, and only barely avoided marring up my face.

Three days later, I can still can’t walk without a little limp as a direct result of that play. I’ve had to forego playing basketball, my favorite activity, and I got absolutely slaughtered in an important tennis match due to a lack of mobility. The thing that keeps striking me as I reflect on the incident is the how utterly wasteful my actions were. The game was decided by that point, and I was only playing out of anger and a wounded pride. I had allowed myself to be offended over the fact that the other team was still trying hard—something that was never intended to be offensive—and as such I suffered some pretty bad consequences.

I learned that we should always put things into perspective. What is one play at the end of a football game worth? In hindsight, it certainly wasn’t worth my tennis match, the pain, and the opportunity to play other sports. Had the injury been worse, the costs would’ve piled up as doctors got involved. All of that cost was completely avoidable had I just kept a level head and not made such a reckless attempt. Going forward, I’m going to try to be better at keeping all things in perspective. One play at the end of a blow-out is never worth a serious injury.  

Online Interview

Today I had the experience of getting to do my first online interview. It was an entirely new concept for me, and one that I think I could have handled better. It was easy to justify under-preparation by the thought that it was just a Skype interview, and therefore there was less that I needed to prepare. But after the interview I realized how many advantages exist in an online setting that don't exist when doing a face-to-face interview.

 For example, I could have easily printed out my “selling points”—the things I wanted the interviewer to clearly understand about myself—and pasted them behind the computer so that I could easily and naturally be reminded of them as I answered questions. I should have had a copy of my own resume in front of me that I could refer to, as well as a way to take notes. With an online interview, the opportunities to use visual cues, reminders and other helpful materials are nearly limitless, yet I capitalized on none of those. I will make sure to remedy that when I have a real interview next time.

The biggest lesson I learned from this experience was that the scriptural axiom is still true: “If ye are prepared ye shall not fear”. A little extra preparation for an online interview can go a long ways.

The Power of Networking

           Last week, opportunity start knocking on my door. I started the week very content at my job working with Dining Services. But in less than 24 hours, I had two different friends tell me about great career-advancing job opportunities in their organizations. They were both sweet opportunities that would further my career, increase my income, and potentially decrease the number of hours I was working, all while providing a job that would be more fun that what I was currently doing. I was flattered by the offers and applied to both, obtaining the first one.

The really incredible thing though, was how absolutely under-qualified I felt for both jobs. I think had I seen a job posting for either job, I probably would have passed them by and assumed that there was no way the employers would hire me. Having an inside contact to pass my resume and recommend me to the supervisor made all the difference. I think that my contact’s name was brought up no less than 50 times in my interview for the job that I eventually obtained—it was obvious that his influence made a huge difference in my application process.

While I obviously understood the theory of networking before this experience, I had never seen it so dramatic in my own life. It was incredible how many doors opened up for me because of my contacts. My takeaway from this experience is two-fold. First, I definitely want to do a better job of expanding my circle of contacts. But just as important to me is the new understanding of how much of a help I can be for others. I want to do a lot better of job of giving opportunities to others, in a kind of “pay it forward” way to return the favor that I was given. I’m determined to find ways to open doors for others and help them achieve their dreams, because I’ve seen firsthand how beneficial the help of another can be. 

The Recharge

            This week I learned the importance of recharging physically and spiritually. I have been trying to live a very active lifestyle. One of my least favorite things to do is to be in my apartment and consequently, I find every excuse to be out and about, doing things. I even came up with a way to track the way I was spending my time, and I’ve been working hard to minimize the time I spend doing non-productive things.

            I’ve been working especially hard in an effort to get ahead on my life. One day I was walking out of class when I was hit by a solid wall of fatigue. I decided to use my class break to take a twenty-minute nap and have a really meaningful scripture study. When I did, I was so much happier and much more effective for the rest of the day. I still checked off as many things on my to-do list as I had planned, but I felt happier and much more energetic the rest of the day.

            From this experience I’ve learned that it’s not only what you’re doing that is important, but how you do it also really counts. It’s so important to make sure that we are in our top forms, because then we can be more productive and efficient. I’m resolved to remember to watch my own energy levels and make sure that I’m always rested and spiritually ready to go so that I can always perform at my best.

Expectations on Perfection

While it may not be the most original idea to post on some kind of social media outlet about the LDS General Conference, I’m going to continue the trend today. I feel that this week I learned a pretty profound lesson about life that deserves to be shared.

                My lesson came as President Uchtdorf spoke. He took the theme of his talk from the line in the Bible in which the Lord tells his apostles that one of them will betray Him. They ask the question: “Lord, is it I?” President Uchtdorf then crafted a very inspired message about looking inwards for blame, rather than pointing fingers around us.

                This bothered me a little. While the cleanliness level in my room attests to the fact that I am no perfectionist, I constantly struggle because I set extremely high expectations for myself. I tend to think that I am a much better athlete, scholar, missionary, roommate, and person than I actually am, and I get frustrated when my performance never turns out as well as I anticipated. After 21 years of periodically feeling like I’ve never achieved my potential, I occasionally wonder if my expectations are too high for myself—am I justified in thinking that I really can be that good?

                Then President Uchtdorf said something that I loved. He said that if we are blind to our mistakes, we are also blind to our divine potential. Conversely, if we keep our sights on the unlimited potential that has been promised to us, then we should be seeing our weaknesses. To me, this means that my thoughts are justified. If we understand the true extent of what is possible for us to achieve, then we ought to be discontent with mediocrity. When we see what we can become, then we should not be complacent with where we are; we ought to continue rising and climbing and becoming better and better on a daily basis.

                Now I’m not advocating for perfectionism—that can end up with a lot of broken hopes and can often do more harm than good—but I am advocating for all of us to continue on our individual journey to become better. The heights of complete self-mastery might not be summited today or tomorrow, but we are doing something wrong if we are not walking uphill.  Every day ought to be a new step for us in the right direction. Inevitably, we will slip and fall, but that’s okay as long as we continue to keep making another attempt. I’m determined to continue to climb upward and search for more within myself as I try to become the man I imagine that I can be, because I have an idea of what perfection is, and that perfection eventually is attainable. 

   

It's all in the Details

                I am currently an employee of BYU Dining Services. The other day at work I was assigned to go visit one of our store’s suppliers to pick up some food. As I was walking out of the door, one of the sub-supervisors in my department asked me to check up on the status of two croissants that we were supposed to have received earlier, and bring those croissants back if they were finished. I nodded, figuring that the suppliers would know what she was talking about, and headed over.

                Upon arriving at the supplier’s work area, I inquired into the croissants. I was directed to the head of department, who appeared rather over-worked and stressed. He glared at me and asked me what I was looking for. I replied that I was looking for two croissants for my department, expecting that he would know exactly what I was talking about. He didn’t. He got closer in my face and very loudly informed me that our supplier sells six types of croissants, and asked what type I was requesting. I had heard nothing about the croissants that day, and could only whisper out that I honestly didn’t have any clue. He then announced that I was no use to him, because without knowing which type of croissant I needed, he couldn’t help me. He pivoted and strode off to the far weightier matters of the BYU Dining Service than some minimum-wage student employee.

               As I walked away, I thought about how badly that communication had failed. I had assumed that he would know the details of what was going on with the croissants, and when that assumption backfired, I found myself in the embarrassing and humbling situation of having to admit ignorance. It was an interesting application to what we’ve been discussing in my MCOMM class, and it taught me that it is really important to know one’s audience. Making assumptions is risky, and it is far better to gather all of the details and present them in a way that cannot be misunderstood, rather than only gather and present a fraction of the necessary information and hope that another party can understand. Misunderstanding and frustration is the result when we only present a part of the whole. After this experience, I’m determined to do a better job of really trying to understand all of the facts before I leap to trying to communicate to others.

Confidence

            Recently I’ve been getting plenty of chances to play basketball. I love the sport and really enjoy playing it, but my skills (or lack thereof) sometimes leave me frustrated. Not that I’m terrible, but I haven’t played a ton of competitive basketball in my life. This past week I’ve learned how important confidence is on the court.

Earlier this week, I was playing in a game with one of my friends who first saw me play during my mission. For whatever reason, he came off of the mission with the impression that I was a really good outside shooter. Consequently, he gave me the ball a lot and was always encouraging me to shoot it. Inspired by his confidence, I was confident, and I shot a lot. Incredibly, the shots went in! I played very well and had a blast the entire time.

Contrasting that experience is the chance I had to play with another group of my friends. One of these friends was an All-state basketball player, and I didn’t even make the high school JV squad, so his opinion of my game perhaps wasn’t too high. We were playing on the same team, and there were a few times when he yelled at me after I made a bad play. Consequently, I started getting fearful, and instead of being confident in my skills, I doubted my own ability to make even the most basic shots. And this spiraled into a self-fulfilling prophecy, as I did indeed end up missing a ton of really wide-open and easy shots. My play could only be described as "terrible".

What this experience taught me is that confidence impacts performance. And I don’t think that principle is limited to basketball, or even sports in general. As we are confident in ourselves, we take more risks and we experiment. We will put our full effort into important decisions and actions. On the other hand, when we are fearful, we tend to pull back and withdraw when key opportunities arise. As the saying goes, “both he who says ‘I can’ and he who says ‘I can’t’ both end up right.” Thus it is important to always try to stay confident, and help others do the same. After seeing firsthand the value of confidence, I’m determined to try to do a better job to help those around me stay confident. Both of my friends had a big impact on my performance, and I’m determined to be that friend who compliments others and puts his trust in others, so that they can achieve their full potential.

An Outsider's Take

           To preface this post, I just want to be up front and say that I’m a person that likes to be right. I always want to have the right answer for a question, and I absolutely hate being wrong. While perhaps on the outside that looks like a good trait, by implication it usually means that I am also fairly proud. I like to find my own ways of doing things and I don’t usually go ask for help.     

This week I was given the opportunity to stretch out of that pride. I was given a difficult assignment in one of my classes, and after a couple of hours of working on it, I ended up stuck. It was frustrating place for me to be, but I swallowed my pride, and for the first time in my high school or college career, I decided to go into a TA lab and ask for help. I sat the TA down and opened up by journal to start peppering him with questions, only to be surprised to hear him refer me back to the instructions on the assignment. Lo and behold, there were the answers to 95% of my questions, sitting right in front of me. All I had needed was someone simply to say “look over the instructions again” and almost all of my problems were solved.

This experience, along with many others, has taught me the value of an outside opinion. There are so many times when in the pursuit of my own excellence, I tend to de-value the advice I receive from others. That’s a terrible idea. My mind only brings but one of many important perspectives to the table. I cannot possibly think of every single possibility for a situation, and consequently I need others to point out flaws that I overlook. There is so much power in the questions “what can I do better” and “what do you think I can improve?” When I ask those questions, information flows in ways that I never would have thought of. I discover a clearer picture of the truth, as well as valuable insight and perspective that points towards a better course of action.

I’m now determined to not let my pride slow me down any more. If I truly want to function at my best, it’s time to start asking more questions and acting a little more humbly. 

Persistence

For of those new to this blog, especially those from the MCOMM class, I say welcome. I’m Aaron Wilson. 

             For the last two years, I’ve been spending my time in the urban jungles of sunny Thailand, giving my heart and soul to the cause of helping the wonderful Thai people as an authorized representative of Jesus Christ. That experience has defined me in new ways that I never imagined. I tried very hard as a missionary to really throw myself into the missionary work and forget the world I left behind. I won’t make any claims to being a consecrated, great, or even a good missionary, but I do feel that I succeeded in forgetting a lot of the world that I left behind. How do I know that? Because coming home has left me feeling like a whale in the middle of the Sahara—lost, floundering, and utterly confused.

            I’m trying not to wax too poetical here, but for two years I spent every waking moment trying to hone a skill-set and a mind-set developed around the missionary’s purpose. And in a flash, most of the direct applications of the skills that I’d learned went obsolete. The ability to drive boldly in Thailand will only get me a ticket here. The ability to walk up to complete strangers and invite them to repent and be baptized is next to useless at BYU, which is perhaps the most LDS-saturated environment on the planet outside of the Conference Center. Suddenly another skill set is being demanded of me—the ability to read and write in English. I’m expected to have small-talk conversations, when all of my impulses tell me to start searching for people’s needs and try to find ways to help them repent. Apparently I also lost the ability to read a text, memorize the key meanings in it, and then regurgitate it on demand in a test settings. That one was shown rather painfully on the few quizzes I’ve taken.     

            Now I don’t say these things in an effort to earn sympathy. I fully know that there are millions of others who have walked this path of post-mission adjustment, and that I don’t have a corner on the market. And I will not for a minute stand for anyone even thinking that I feel bad about my decision to make a mission, just because the end of it was hard: I had the greatest time of my life and learned so many valuable things in Thailand. I wouldn’t trade that mission for the world. But I explain this background simply to frame a context with which I can explain what I learned this week, and how I’m going to apply it.

            My lesson can perhaps be best illustrated from the feelings I had as I sat down after getting systematically demolished on the BYU tennis courts this past week. I love tennis, and I’ve played competitively for a number of years. That night, however, all of my practice and skills seemed useless when my brother steamrolled me for an easy 6-0 victory for him. The frustrating part for me was that I had played the best tennis since I got home. It had felt like everything was clicking for me. I was hitting the ball hard and fast, and my accuracy was good, but yet somehow I had won pitifully few points and had looked like the middle school practice squad in comparison to my opponent. I was never even in serious contention for the match, not even for a second. The easiest way of saying it would be to say that my best simply was not good enough to compete.

            And so I sat down afterwards, and at that moment I was faced with a decision. I was in a sour mood after taking such a beat-down. It wasn’t a pleasant experience. The voice inside my brain was telling me that this wasn’t worth it, that it was time to walk off the court and go do something less painful. I knew at that moment that I’d have to go back to the basics and start re-learning tennis skills that I had once mastered long ago. The thought of that painful process made me bitter, for I thought I was cheated. Hadn’t my rustiness on the court come because I was doing something better? Should not all of my hard work before my mission and on my mission combined to allow me some free-pass on going through the growing pains all over again? And at that moment, the idea of just giving up and walking away from the court seemed mighty enticing. Why come back? I’m not being forced to play tennis. It’s not fun, so why not stop?

            That thought of quitting has not been companionless in my mind for several weeks. The thing that I’m learning about the rebuilding process is that it isn’t easy. In my mind, I had assumed that previous success in tennis, school, or any field would give me a short-cut in rebuilding my new life. The fact is that a house burned down still requires the same amount of labor to build it the second time as the first time did.

            As I reflect on that moment on the tennis court, I am reminded of President Uchtdorf’s words: “Our destiny is not determined by the number of times we stumble but by the number of times we rise up, dust ourselves off, and move forward.” The truth is that it will take more effort, discipline, and practice than I was expecting in order to get my tennis game back, just as it will require the same effort, discipline, and practice to succeed again in school, social settings, and whatever else that I’m lacking. But rather than get frustrated that my progress seems slow, or that I seem to be under-achieving in compared to what I used to be able to do, I’m choosing to take the positive viewpoint. I’ve succeeded once before; why I can’t I do again? I choose to build on the hope that comes from realizing that I’ve walked this road once before and conquered it, and so I am determined to do it again.

            Now this isn’t just a post for all the returned missionaries in the audience. But for everyone reading, we all have our different times when we feel that we underperform, that we fail to reach up to our personal expectations. When that moment comes, look not to the ‘failures’ of life, but instead choose to see everything as a chance to get better. Life is longer than we think, and eternity lasts forever, so there will always be another chance. It is never too late to be better. Don’t give up, because tomorrow will be better. As a wise friend once told me “the only way to fail is to stop trying”. So keep your eyes on a brighter tomorrow and keep hope that things will get better!

            For my part, I decided in that insightful moment to keep playing for another 40 minutes, in which I continued to get trashed by my competition, but I know that in so doing I’m now just a little better at tennis than I would have been had I quit. I walk away from this experience more resolved to never quit in all of my re-adjustment activities, and to work harder than ever before, because I know that quitting makes my weaknesses part of my future, and only continuing to strive harder makes them my past.