Writing helps me think, helps
me clarify my ideas and my views, and helps me re-affirm those ideas and views
and opinions that I have. Quite frankly, I write at a much higher level when I’m
writing to an audience, and so I write the following not so much for reader
entertainment, as some of my posts are, but for more personal purposes. It is
my hope that perhaps you might gain some benefit from reading, but that is not
my goal. This is all just a fair warning to say that what follows is going to
be deep and heartfelt, not light and entertaining as I envision my other posts
are (and please don’t correct me if I’m wrong on that).
As is usual, the ideas behind this post started with a
rather simple discussion. I was talking to some friends who told me they were
baking a dessert for one of their friends who was having a bad week. At some
point in the discussion, the following exchange took place:
“Aaron, if you tell us the
next time you have a bad week, we’ll make you something too.”
I cheekily responded, “I don’t
have bad weeks”.
That was not a true statement. In the past year, my life
has gone through a lot of dramatic changes—finishing high school and thus ending
the pattern that has dominated my life for the past 12 years, moving hundreds
of miles to a new state, and starting life away from home, to name a few—and I
for one am of the belief that no major change happens without a cost. Adaptation
to something new means letting go of a lot of things, and for me, that often
includes things that I like. With that change comes bad days, and sometimes bad
weeks.
These dramatic changes haven’t finished yet. For those of
you who don’t know, today is the last day of classes for BYU. That means that I
have about one week left before my life takes another dramatic turn. Many of my
current friends will travel back to their hometowns. I’ll be moving back in
with my parents—and while I’ll be taking classes still for BYU’s spring term,
my lifestyle will be considerably different at my new home as compared to the
dorms.
This could be a depressing post. After all, I’ve just
said that change brings pain, and then told what changes are on the nearest
horizon. However, sadness is not what I feel, because there is a little bit of
truth to that statement I made to my friend: although I do have bad days, they
are never really THAT bad. The question that I have been mulling over in the
past couple of weeks is “why?”
With the same egotism that inspired me to quip that bad
days simply don’t happen to me, I could reason that I am so good at life that
nothing fazes me. That fact is that that statement is a straight-up lie,
however much I wish that it was true. I’m not special, and I make just as many
mistakes as the next guy. Perfect success in every endeavor does not describe
my way of doing things, and so cannot possibly be the reason that I am happy.
One of my all-time favorite phrases is that most noble French
idiom my Dad used to repeat to me often. I will spare you my poor attempt at
spelling a language I’ve never spoken—seeing as I have a hard enough time
spelling my own language—just know that it has a poetic ring to it. The
translation is “attitude determines altitude”. Perhaps then, as I feel that I
am blessed to be flying at a good altitude, that my attitude is a cause of
this? To that question I feel more comfortable in saying yes, but at the same
time, that answer must have a qualification, because again I feel no more
special than anyone else. The mind of Aaron doesn’t magically think positively
all the time, which would make weathering the storms of life so much easier.
There has to be some reason behind this. The next question then, is “why do I
have a good attitude most of the time?”
On that question of attitude I have pondered, and in the
past little while it has been definitively answered in my mind. I have gotten
several incredible opportunities to learn at the feet of some wonderful men and
women these last few weeks. I have sat through amazing lessons in my Mission Preparation
class, and in my Book of Mormon class, in which I walked away uplifted and
inspired. I had the privilege to watch general conference, and for once see it
through the eyes of a speaker, as my father’s brother spoke in that meeting. I
was able to learn of the application of the gospel to every part of life
through a guest speaker in my accounting class (because if the gospel applies
to something as random as accounting, it has to apply to everything).
The most
powerful of these experiences occurred just a few days ago when I attended a
powerful fireside about the concept of grace that was given by my bishop, and
that experience seemed to perfectly cap off what I now understand about my attitude.
My answer is simple: the reason I can have a positive attitude is because I can
see a larger picture. That picture is the grand purpose of my life—the reason
that I’m living, the reason that I’m in school, the reason for everything that I
do. When I can see the bigger concepts behind my life, suddenly smaller things
fade away. What does it matter if I have to spend hours upon hours in the
library? If my grand purpose is to draw nearer to my Savior, I’m going to have
to learn to work hard, and doing math problems or reading textbooks is a good
way to accomplish that.
Yes,
it is my religion that gives me my attitude. My hope and my joy springs from my
knowledge of God’s Plan of Happiness, my understanding of the Gospel of Jesus
Christ, and above all, my finite yet growing comprehension of the
incomprehensible and infinite Atonement of Jesus the Christ. What clouds of life
can take away my sunshine when I know of my purpose in life, when I understand
how to get there, and when I have a heavenly friend walking beside me every
step of the way? Nothing can or ever will compare to the wonderful feelings
that result when I learn of eternal truths—truths that provide comfort,
direction, and hope to my life.
1 comment:
I loved this. Well said. You are a positive person and I really appreciate that you are! Thanks for being a great friend and example :)
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